Handling Disappointment

 “The LORD was with Samuel as he grew up, and he let none of his words fall to the ground.” 1 Samuel (3:19).

Welcome to life; "Disappointments guaranteed!

"When expectations fail to be met, they produce anger, frustration, sadness and discouragement." When you're disappointed with those you look up to, think of Samuel and Eli. Samuel's mother entrusted her child to Eli the High Priest, confident he would mentor and prepare him for God's service. But Eli had a serious character flaw. He was a weak, passive parent who stood by while his sons abused their priestly privilege, bringing shame and disrepute to the ministry. Who would have blamed young Samuel for taking a nose dive when the man he looked up to failed so badly? But no, he fielded his disappointment and kept his eyes on God: "Samuel grew, and the Lord was with him". As a result God turned him into one of Israel's greatest prophets. So keep your eyes on the Lord.

"When you're disappointed in those you live with. If anyone wouldn't let you down, surely it wouldn't be your family right? Wrong! Ask young Joseph. When God promised him a big promotion he thought his brothers would celebrate. Instead they responded with jealousy, ridicule and resentment, selling him into slavery. Far from friends he languished in prison for a crime he didn't commit. What an invitation to bitterness, to rehearsing the wrongs done him while plotting his revenge. But if he had done that he'd have died an unknown convict in a foreign jail. Instead he allowed God to vindicate him, using his circumstances to position, prepare and promote him to being Egypt's Prime minister-and that's how you deal with disappointment.

"When you're disappointed in those who you work with and depend on. To succeed you need people; you can't make it without them. And when those people fail you it's painful. Like Moses' disappointment. He leaves his brother Aaron in charge while he attends a summit conference with God and receives the Ten Commandments. Returning, he finds Israel in anarchy, idolatry and unspeakable perversion. Where's Aaron? Leading the rebellion! When Moses needs him most, Aaron fails miserably.

But watch Moses; true leadership shines in deep disappointment. He confronts Aaron, takes the mess to God for resolution, and prays for forgiveness for Israel. God listens, then reminds Moses of his assignment. "It's disappointing, Moses but-go, lead the people--My angel will go before you. Disappointment doesn't cancel your assignment-or God's presence. Do what He sent you to do.
"When you're disappointed in those you have poured your life into. Moses the founding Pastor of the First Church of the Critical and the Ungrateful, a congregation of former slaves, delivered, abundantly blessed, en route to the Promised Land, but without a shred of loyalty or gratitude for the man who put everything on the line to make it possibly. Fresh out of Egypt they turn on Moses, accusing, blaming and berating him. Was Moses disappointed and hurt? Yes. But each time he wanted to quit he'd discuss it with God, pray for his complaining flock, receive fresh orders from headquarters and return to work. It's what God-called men and woman are to do when they're disappointed and feel like giving up.

"When we are disappointed in ourselves. It's potentially the most debilitating kind of disappointment because it can throw us into a downward spiral that's hard to stop or recover from. Peter had sworn undying love and fidelity to Jesus. "Lord everybody else may abandon you but not me! I'm yours till death" And he meant every word of it. But under the pressure surrounding the crucifixion he yields, and three times denies knowing Jesus. Peter, heartbroken by his own dismal failure, "went outside and wept bitterly". We often ask, "God how can you possibly use someone as messed up as me!

Peter failed to meet his own expectations and went on a downer. But Jesus wasn't shocked. He was well aware of Peter's flaws when he called him into the ministry. He also knew that his blustering, outspoken disciple had a tender heart, so He extended Grace to him rather than remove him from office. When Christ gave post-resurrection orders to "tell His disciples and Peter to meet Him in Galilee, He reaffirmed His choice of the failed disciple. When we confront failure; Don't add insult to injury by letting disappointment mire you in hopelessness and despair. Humble yourself and repent. Confess your sin; don't excuse, rationalize or blame circumstances and people. Receive God's grace and forgiveness by faith, not feelings. Don't let Satan convince you your case is beyond grace. Get whatever help you need to get back on track-sooner, not later.

Reverend William Bowers.