Cultivating Communities 

James (3:18)
Peacemakers who sow in peace raise a harvest of righteousness.

Acts (2:42)
They devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching and to the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and prayer.

The depth of a church is determined by the quality of it's worship and instruction.
We must keep that near the top of our awareness. The breath of a church is determined by it's commitment to fellowship and evangelism. We must keep reaching out to people who are in need.
You can develop a healthy, robust community that lives right with God and enjoy it's results only if you do the hard work of getting along with each other, treating each other with dignity and honor.

Ephesians (4:3)
Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace. Community requires commitment.
Only the Holy Spirit can create real fellowship between believers, but he cultivates it with the choices and commitments we make. It takes both God's power and our effort to produce a loving Christian community. Unfortunately, many people grow up in broken families with unhealthy relationships, so they lack the relational skills needed for real fellowship. They must be taught how to get along with and relate to others in God's family.

Cultivating community takes honesty .You will have to care enough to lovingly speak the truth, even when you would rather gloss over a problem or ignore an issue.
While it is much easier to remain silent when others around you are harming themselves or others with a sinful pattern, it is not the loving thing to do. Most people have no one in their lives that love them enough to tell them the truth(even when it's painful), so they continue in self-destructive ways. Often we know what needs to be said to someone, but our fears prevent us from saying anything. Many fellowships have been sabotaged by fear: No one had the courage to speak up in the group while a member's life fell apart. The Bible tells us to "speak the truth in love" because we can't have community without candor. Paul says, "brothers and sisters, if someone in your group does something wrong, you who are spiritual should go to that person and gently help make him right again."

Many church fellowships and small groups remain superficial because they are afraid of conflict. Wherever an issue pops up that might cause tension or discomfort, it is immediately glossed over in order to preserve a false sense of peace. Mr. don't rock the boat jumps in and tries to smooth everyone's ruffled feathers, the issues is never resolved, and everyone lives with the underlying frustration. Everyone knows the problem, but no one talks about it openly. This creates a sick environment of secrets where gossip thrives. Paul had the solution right when he said, "No more lies no more pretense. Tell your neighbor the truth. In Christ's body we're all connected to each other, after all.
When you lie to others, you end up lying to yourself. Real fellowship, whether in a marriage, a friendship, or your church, depends on frankness. In fact, the tunnel of conflict is the passage to intimacy in any relationship. Until you care enough to confront and resolve the underlying barriers, you will never grow close to each other.
When conflict is handled correctly, we grow closer to each other by facing and resolving our differences.

Frankness by no means is a license to say anything you want, wherever you want .
It is not rudeness. The Bible tells us there is a right time and a right way to do everything'. Thoughtless words leave lasting wounds. God tells us to speak to each other in the church as loving family members:" Never use harsh words when you correct an older man, but talk to him as if he was your father. Talk to younger men as if they were your brothers, older woman as if they were your mothers, and younger woman as if they were your sisters.

Sadly though, thousands of fellowships have been destroyed by a lack of honesty. Paul had to rebuke the Corinth church for their passive code of silence in allowing immorality in their fellowship. Since no one had the courage to confront it, he said, "You must not simply look the other way and hope it goes away on it's own. Bring it out in the open and deal with it. Better devastation and embarrassment than damnation'. You pass it off as a small thing, but it's anything but that, you shouldn't act as if everything is just fine when one of your Christian companions is promiscuous or crooked, is flip with God or rude to friends, or becomes greedy and predatory. You can't just go along with this, treating it as acceptable behavior. I'm not responsible for what the outsiders do, but don't we have some responsibility for those within our community of believers?"

Cultivating community takes humility. Self-importance, smugness, and stubborn pride destroy fellowship faster than anything else. Pride builds walls between people; humility builds bridges. Humility is the oil that smooths and soothes relationships.

Reverend William Bowers